You've probably heard about this already. From cnn.com:
"The attorney for a couple charged with 34 counts of negligent homicide said Tuesday his clients never abandoned the nursing home where people tried to ride out Hurricane Katrina."
It gets worse.
"I told her I had two buses with two drivers that would take them wherever they want," Bertucci told CNN.
But he said he was told that five special needs patients could not be evacuated. "She said, 'I have five nurses, I have a generator, and I've spoken to the families and they said it was OK.' "
OK to leave their old, frail, sick parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles to face a Category 4 hurricane?
"At the end of the day the relatives of these people decided that it was best for their relatives to be there."
Beats having Mom and Dad grumping around the house and needing their diapers changed in the middle of a hurricane, huh?
"Workers at the nursing home called each family, Cobb said, to tell them they were prepared with supplies and medicine and were staying at the home. Only six people came to get family members."
Out of 34 old people, six had family that took care of them when they were old.
Those aren't very good odds.
Make sure you're putting money away for your old age, because you cannot rely on family to be there for you. Not children, not grandchildren, not siblings or nieces or nephews, even come both hell and high water.
The care you get when you're old won't depend on how many progeny you have; it will come down to how many dollars you have.
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
They'll take care of you when you're old? No.
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6 comments:
While you should never have children just so they can take care of you or do something for you, it is unfair to say that the families of those nursing home patients abandoned them. I heard an interview with the family of two of the patients. They said they called the home to ask if they needed to come get their mother and their aunt. The owners told them there was no need because they had buses ready if evacuation became necessary. They were told to go ahead and leave. Their relatives would be fine. I imagine this was the case for many of the families.
I can't imagine just leaving a loved relative at the nursing home, even if the staff said they had buses ready, but whatever. I still don't think the families cared enough to make sure their relatives got out safely. Just because family of two of the patients claim they were told that buses had been arranged doesn't make it true, anyway. I wouldn't be surprised if they're trying to set the grounds for a lawsuit (and yes, the nursing home owners deserve to be sued, prosecuted, jailed, etc.).
Some of us can't ever imagine putting a loved one in a nursing home to begin with. But I know there will probably come a time when I will do just that. Most people go to nursing homes because their relatives can't care for them at home anymore. How are they supposed to care for them on the road and in a hotel room? (or driving around looking for a room as many had to do) And it's not like they could just hire a nurse on the spur of the moment even if they had the money. You're right the owners should pay and I'm sure they will go to jail. But I still don't buy your argument.
I was agonizing a few years ago about whether to have kids or not. I was pretty sure I didn't want to, but was afraid I'd have a change of heart a few years later, when it was too late. And so I spent a lot of time talking to friends who were parents and friends who wanted to be parents about what it was about parenthood that attracted them. And in a number of cases it was the desire to have someone take care of them in their old age. Which, in my view, just isn't a good reason, as this post highlights.
I teach gerontology courses and it is amazing the number of students who think their children will take care of them when they get old and they will never have to enter a nursing home; only the selfish childless old people end up in nursing homes. But, I soon burst their little bubble. Oh, you have an awesome blog keep up the great work!
My late younger sister was a nurse's aide. She told me many stories about nursing home patients who never got so much as a phone call after their so-called loving children dropped them off a the door. After one of the patients died, their son told the nurses to drop the body in Potter's Field and not bother them because they weren't interested. No, you can't depend on kids or other relatives to look after you in your senior years.
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